Identification: No one can miss The Fat Girl because she is, well, fat. The Fat Girl is usually wearing things that she has to shoe horn herself into like miniskirts, half shirt, and skintight dresses.  In my research it is my belief that The Fat Girl has poor eyesight because that is the only way that they would have the guts (no pun intended) to leave the house the way they look.  There are two beginning stages of The Fat Girl.  One is the “Skinny” Fat Girl.  She, at one time, was a skinny little thing, maybe popular with the boys, but then something happened.  Usually it is having kids that make The Fat Girl what she is today.  The second type is The “Hey I’ve Always Been Fat But I Use My Humor To Make Friends and Deal With My Weight” Fat Girl.  I just abbreviate it as The “HIABFBIUMHTMFADWMW” Fat Girl.  Its far too complicated to say but much easier to write.  You can identify The “HIABFBIUMHTMFADWMW” Fat Girl by the way she cracks jokes and her overly nice attitude to everyone.

Hangouts:  Some of the species of The Fat Girl can be found at the club with their attractive friends.  Beware of this type because they are in a sub category called “cling ons.”  They cling onto their hotter friends and fend off any male pursuers of their group.  If you see The Fat Girl with a hot girl you’d like to approach, try luring her away with a pastry of some sort, or maybe a nice roast.  The other class of The Fat Girl, The “Regular” Fat Girl can be found just about anywhere.  They are just normal run of the mill girls, except fat.

Capture: Some of you out there are into The Fat Girls, and that’s ok.  Don’t ever let someone tell you that you’re crazy for your attraction to her.  The Fat Girl has many good uses and when you find out what they are, you let me know.  To grab yourself The Fat Girl all you need is to follow these simple step-by-step instructions.  Step 1.  Go to your local grocery store and purchase a German Chocolate cake.  It’s a well-known fact that The Fat Girl loves this delicacy.  Step 2.  Construct a box big enough to hold that special lady that you’ve been eyeing.  Step 3. Cut the end off of a broom tie a string to the bottom and prop the broomstick up against the box.  Step 4.  Place your trap outside a place where your target frequents and place the cake inside.  Once The Fat Girl has seen the cake, she will go for it.  When she slides inside the box, pull the string a spring your trap!  I’ve made some diagrams for you to make it a little clearer.  The Fat Girl will usually finish the whole cake before realizing that she is inside a box but after that she will a little panicked. This is where you sooth and woo The Fat Girl with you honorable and loving intentions.  Once you have fat girl they are usually faithful, in fact, the fatter and uglier the better.  Once you go fat, you’ll never go back.  I guess that’s what they say.

Cost:  Hope you have good credit because The Fat Girl will eat you out of house and home.  Try all you can eat buffets.

Warnings:  Never let The Fat Girl on top when having intercourse.  Never let The Fat Girl eat after midnight and never get them wet.

Also Known As: Fatty, Biggun, Heifer, Big Fatty Fat Fat Girl

Official Hung Over Harry Rankings (1 to 10)

Sex Factor: 1     Money Factor: 10     Relationship Factor: 10     Overall: 2

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